Tag: ADHD

Hero in Progress

Weekend Quest: Small Wins, Big Progress in the Lair

Mell D'Clute
SuperMell completes a cleaning “side quest” in a retro video game-style scene, transforming a messy room into an organized space while Diana the cat watches like a quest giver and an XP bar fills above.

Quest Accepted

Sometimes all you need is a small win. A mission.

This is the start of a long weekend, and I plan on getting my home in order. I spent a bit too much time stuck in depression over the last couple of weeks. It’s time to get myself back in gear.

This weekend isn’t about perfection. It’s about small, doable wins. I have to regroup and get back to cleaning my home and finishing the great unpacking saga that has lasted since I moved in my apartment in January.

Last week was heavy… This weekend is about movement.

Current Lair Status: Where Things Stand

Since the Depression Beast and the Procrastinator were very active the last couple of weeks, some things didn’t get accomplished. I still have to figure out how to hang pictures on my walls without nails. Command strips alone don’t seem to be working, so I may need to switch to hooks.

Depression made it nearly impossible for me to get back to my tidying routine. The place has gotten a bit messy again. I have decided to use this long weekend to tackle the cleaning of my place. The pictures will have to wait a bit longer.

I did finish setting up my creative studio. There were some unexpected car issues this week, and I needed a new battery. I was still on the original battery that came with the car, and it lasted 14 years. But it was time to get a replacement. As such, I needed to access my tools and have to put them back on the shelf in the creative studio.

My place isn’t totally chaotic. It just requires a little bit of elbow grease.

What’s Working (XP Gained)

On the work front, I’ve made some progress. The meetings have been much friendlier than the first couple of ones I had. They feel more like discussions than “Oh, I’m in trouble now.” I’ve started tracking how long I take on each project. I was asked to do a QA check on my work before completing it, unless it’s just one or two small items. This will take some getting used to, as I don’t like feeling like I’m bothering people. But it’s required of everyone, so I guess I have to do it.

I’ve had some progress on getting better at certain tasks and I’m getting quite close to the target of 20 projects per day (at least). Once a week, I will be working with someone one-on-one to get additional training where I can ask questions, and see how they do things faster to see where I might be able to pick up some speed.

I had a couple of days with some challenging projects that wound up taking much longer than anticipated. I’ve asked for additional help or training to try to figure out how to do it quicker, as I don’t see how at this point. I won’t go into specifics, but let’s just say this project requires laminating and cutting covers, cutting books, marrying them up, manually coil-punching in a wall calendar kind of way, and then coiling. These aren’t thin books either. They said they’ll come up with a plan to teach me how to do it quicker.

I’ve made some significant gains at work, and still find some things challenging. But it’s all coming together.

What’s Still a Challenge (Boss Battle Preview)

I feel much more secure now than I did a couple of weeks ago. It feels like they want me to succeed. That seems to have pushed the Depression Beast back into the shadows for now. He’s still there, just not in plain sight anymore.

It’s been difficult to get going on some tasks. Also, when things like my car breaking down happen, I tend to only focus on the one big problem at a time. I was without a car for two work days, and had to figure out how to take an Uber to and from work both days. I was surprised at how fast and easy it was. (Tip: Don’t pre-book an Uber. Just order it when you need it. Otherwise it costs double.)

But that all is about to change as I tackle my next quest: cleaning the lair. I’m not defeated… just slower than I’d like to be.

This Weekend’s Quest Objectives

The goal is simple: clean the home. Here’s how I’m breaking the quest down:

Thursday Morning/Evening

For today, I plan on cleaning the kitchen/living room, and hallway and entryway. I’ll start this morning by clearing all the recycling, cans, garbage, and clutter. Then I’ll load the dishwasher and run it. After my sleep cycle, I’ll tackle clearing and cleaning the kitchen counter, doing any remaining dishes, and clean the stove, microwave, fridge, table, and sink. Then I’ll move into the living room and dust the furniture, clean the glass items, and vacuum the couch. After that, I will remove any clutter in the hallway and entryway.

Friday Morning/Evening

Friday morning I’ll start the laundry, clean my bedroom, creative studio, and bathroom. I’ll start with my regular clothes, and while that’s running, I’ll tidy up the creative studio. As I finished setting it up not too long ago, it just needs light dusting, putting my tools away, and changing the litter pan. Then I will tackle cleaning the bedroom when the second load of regular clothes goes in. After my clothes are dried, I will fold them and put them away. Then I’ll head to sleep.

Friday evening after my sleep, I will wash the sheets, then the comforter. While my laundry goes, I will tackle cleaning the bathroom. I will start with the mirror, then clean the counter and sink. The toilet will come next. Finally I’ll wind it up with cleaning the shower walls and tub. Then when the laundry is done drying, I will make the bed and call it a day (well, night, but you know what I mean…)

Saturday Morning/Evening

Saturday morning I will prepare a grocery list, go get them and put them away. I might also try to figure out solutions to hanging some pictures. I’ll keep the morning light and just tidy up. After my sleep, I will tackle organizing the storage closet. I will start by flattening the boxes that can be flattened, sort the boxes that would be difficult to take apart, and stack them neatly at the end of the closet. Then I’ll figure out where my other items (fans, dolly, step ladder, and full pop recycling bags go. Then all I have left to do is sweep and mop the entire home.

That will leave the rest of Sunday morning clear of any tasks. All of this is very doable. Once it’s all done, the only thing left will be hanging my pictures and other wall hanging items.

Strategy: How I’m Approaching This

Instead of having a usual “to-do” list, I have called it “What I feel like doing today” list. Even though I have pre-planned this weekend, it still has some wiggle room just in case I don’t feel like tackling something, or decide to do a different task instead. Once this weekend’s quest is done, I’ll return to my “what I feel like doing today” approach and build each day as I go.

I will choose tasks based on my energy of the moment. The plan allows for flexibility, while at the same time avoiding overwhelm.

🐈‍⬛ Diana’s Wisdom: The True Quest Master

Diana enjoys her life. She loves laying in the window basking in the sunshine. There isn’t a small object she won’t try to play hockey with. That pesky red dot light is getting closer to getting caught.

When she naps, she doesn’t feel guilty. If she’s exploring a shadow on the wall (many times it’s her own tail!), she’s simply showing curiosity. And whenever her human is busy doing something, she’s decided to assume the role of my supervisor.

Final Thought: Progress is Progress

I’m about to embark on a quest to get my apartment clean and gain a small win. It might not seem like an exciting quest to some people, but I can finally check something off of my “what I feel like doing today” list. Even the smallest steps count as long as you are progressing. Speed isn’t important. What matters is that I keep moving.

This weekend isn’t about finishing everything. It’s about moving things forward. XP doesn’t come from perfect runs—just from showing up and playing.

What does your weekend quest look like? Share it in the comments. I’d love to hear your story.

Emotional Cartography

Heavy Days: A Spotlight on The Depression Beast

Mell D'Clute
SuperMell moves forward through a foggy landscape symbolizing heavy days, with the Depression Beast quietly following behind and Diana the cat waiting ahead, representing resilience and steady progress.

Progress… and Something Else

Heavy days are difficult to deal with. This week has shown some significant improvements at work. I’m improving my speeds on my tasks, and I’m learning new things. I’m adapting. So… why do I still feel stuck?

In this post, I’m going to dive deep into the very first emotional cartography character I ever created: The Depression Beast.

🐾 Introducing The Depression Beast

For most of my life, I have struggled with depression. I had some rough experiences in my childhood. In an attempt to try to understand it better, I started referring to it as The Depression Beast. It was a way I could separate it from myself.

Initially, I described him as a ferocious beast who liked to sink his claws in me. To me, he felt like a big, scary monster who stalked me constantly. While there would be some battles he would win occasionally, I always thought of it like he just won a battle, not the war.

Now I want to try to understand him, as I’ve done with The Procrastinator, Dr. Anxiety, and Captain Rage. Why does he stalk me so much? Will he ever really go away? Or is there a reason he’s here?

How would I describe him? He’s like a heavy weight pressing down on your chest. He’s big, blue, and has sad eyes. His energy is very subdued, but his mere presence is impactful. He’s not as sharp as Dr. Anxiety, and not as quick as Captain Rage. But he is… heavy.

🧱 What He Feels Like

The Depression Beast feels like he’s constantly there, hiding in the shadows, waiting for the perfect moment to approach. He’s a little timid, and sometimes I don’t see him coming, as he’s also quite stealthy. But when he shows up, he definitely makes his impression.

Here’s what it feels like to me (it may be different for you):

  • A lack of motivation to complete tasks
  • Difficulty getting started—or even getting up at all
  • Emotional heaviness, where energy and willpower feel drained
  • Not sadness, necessarily, but more like gravity getting heavier

For a couple of shifts at work, I wasn’t working particularly fast as I felt this heaviness come over me. Everything felt like a difficult chore.

At home, I didn’t do much of anything in terms of improving my home base. I couldn’t figure out how to hang command strips up on my walls to hang pictures. That setback pushed me deeper into my depression, so I thought I would start by shifting from Phase 4 to Phase 5 of the organizing my home base project: cleaning. But that so far hasn’t happened.

It feels like The Depression Beast has made his presence known.

⚖️ The Paradox

I made some progress at work. Putting down start and finish times is helping me keep track of how much time I actually spend on some tasks. Also, once a week, I get one-on-one training with a coworker where I can see what he does differently or ask questions about the machines I don’t quite understand. Yesterday near the end of my shift, I had another meeting with the bosses and it went well.

The Depression Beast doesn’t care about this. He’s still listening to the terrible review I had and making me feel like things are hopeless. This is why I’m struggling to get myself up and clean the apartment. That heavy feeling that things are hopeless is weighing me down. And that’s the paradox.

🧠 What He Might Be Doing

Perhaps he’s here to remind me to rest occasionally. Maybe he’s helping me process things and figure out what can be done differently. Then again, maybe he slows me down on purpose so I don’t wind up burning myself out.

As I’ve said, I’ve struggled to understand him most of my life. What does he gain by being here? Who am I without him? Would I even recognize myself if he wasn’t here?

Of course I have tried so many things to try to pull myself out of these funks. So many self-help books are on my bookshelf. I’ve also tried medications, some of which work for awhile. Then I hit a roadblock, like the bad review, and it resets itself.

Am I doomed to feel like this forever?

🧭 What I’m Learning

As a person with ADHD, I also tend to struggle with RSD, or Rejection Sensitivity. It hits me much harder than it should. I do believe it’s tied to my many years of being bullied, and my inability to reconcile with it. Maybe they were right about me… Is there any hope for someone who feels this broken or unworthy?

So it feels like it’s tied into my self-esteem. How do I feel about myself? Why do I take criticism too personally? Does it just keep bringing up these feelings of unworthiness? Hmmm…

I had the best shift yesterday and they noticed. I also noticed. So maybe progress is showing up and trying your best. It doesn’t have to show up everywhere to prove itself. Sometimes it shows up in little steps at a time. One area of improvement is a good thing. It should be telling me I can dig myself out of this hole. Should. So why isn’t it helping?

Life is very much like an ocean. It ebbs and flows, has ups and downs. Sometimes it feels like I never have any ups, but I know that’s not the case. That’s how the Depression Beast likes me to feel. But perhaps he just wants me to take a step back and evaluate what’s most important to me in this moment. Clearly, making progress on my home base wasn’t the most important thing for this week. Maybe it showed itself in my improvements at work, once I was able to buckle down and get it done.

Maybe I’m just too hard on myself…

🐈‍⬛ Diana’s Wisdom

Diana would like to remind me that when she was lost and alone, I came into her life and made her feel like she’s a queen. Which of course she is. I’m the only person she trusts. This has to mean something. There are some good qualities in me, Mr. Frodo, and it’s worth fighting for.

🌅 Final Thought: Heavy, But Moving

Heavy days aren’t easy. They exist for a reason. Sometimes trying to figure out that reason is more than half the battle. I may not have all the answers, or know quite how to pull myself out of this funk, but I know eventually it will subside. The Depression Beast doesn’t always roar into the scene, but he does know when he’s not wanted. Even on the days when I feel stuck, something is still shifting beneath the surface.

How would you describe depression? What do you do to pull yourself out of a bout of depression? Please feel free to share in the comments. I’d love to hear about it. Sometimes it helps knowing you aren’t alone in this battle.

Emotional Cartography

Tomorrow’s Problem: A Spotlight on The Procrastinator

Mell D'Clute
SuperMell stands confidently in her black and purple superhero suit with a stylized “M” on the chest, glowing with breakthrough energy as faint chains of light break behind her. Across the room, The Procrastinator lounges in a comfortable chair wearing casual clothes and scrolling on his phone, surrounded by small distractions and a crumpled to-do list on the floor. Diana, a black cat with golden eyes and a white chest tuft, sits calmly beside SuperMell, watching the scene with quiet focus.

The Voice That Says “Later”

By all accounts, I really should be working on setting up my Creative Studio. Instead, I’m sitting here writing about procrastination. It feels like the task that refuses to go away. I know logically that if I tackle the project with full gusto, I can complete it and move on to phase 4 of the organizing plan. Something seems to be weighing me down. It’s that little voice that says, “that’s tomorrow’s problem…” — the one I apparently keep listening to lately.

Now introducing the spotlight on The Procrastinator.

What The Procrastinator Looks Like

I think anyone with ADHD knows what The Procrastinator looks like. He’s a wild card for a reason. I don’t think of him as a dark presence, per se. He’s more like the inner child who just wants to play instead of doing hard work. His wardrobe looks suspiciously like what I’m wearing today. Old t-shirt, jogging pants, hair barely brushed.

When he decides to show up, you can bet there’s some underlying emotions going on. Sometimes I know what those feelings are. Other times I have no idea what’s going on, but I know there must be a reason he’s here.

Sometimes when I write blog posts, I’m not quite sure what it is I want to write about and just let the brain slowly form sentences and figure out what the point of it is. I do believe this is one of those posts where I feel I need to get something off my chest, but am unsure what that is. Bear with me, if you will.

His Favorite Strategy: Delay

The Procrastinator shows himself in a variety of ways. It can be anything from binge watching a favourite show (Hello, fellow One Piece fans!), to playing games, or even a strong desire to write a blog post such as this. Many times, it involves maladaptive daydreaming. It’s something I’ve struggled with most of my life.

He says things like, “Oh, do that later! Let’s have some fun instead!” Sometimes I think he’s doing it because he wants the best for me and doesn’t want to see me overstress myself. Many times, though, I wind up feeling remorseful for giving into his distractions.

Where He Gets His Power

I think that’s common with ADHD. A strong desire to do something productive, but for reasons you can’t quite explain… you just can’t start. You can create all the to-do checklists you want, but when it comes to actually working on it, you freeze up. Overwhelm is usually the culprit. Psychologists often link procrastination to overwhelm and fear of failure. So you can bet Dr. Anxiety isn’t too far behind.

When Dr. Anxiety starts asking “what if everything goes wrong?”, The Procrastinator offers a very simple solution: “Let’s deal with that tomorrow.” It’s classic avoidance. This makes me wonder why I want to avoid working on the things I have a strong desire to do. Is it laziness? Could it be the fear of failure? Or maybe even fear of success?

The Truth About The Procrastinator

I do think he’s trying to be helpful in his own way. He’s trying to keep me from collapsing under pressure, and protect me from burning out. I think he’s also trying to help me understand the importance of a decent work-life balance. Why do I always have to be on? Can’t I have a day off? Maybe I just need to be entertained.

Basically, he’s trying to be a good guy. He doesn’t want me to feel stressed out or overwhelmed. Perhaps he simply wants me to relax and enjoy life more. The problem is when a delayed hour turns into a whole day, or even a week.

The list of things I want to accomplish but never work on is pretty extensive. Career decisions. Creative ideas that started with a creative spark. Learning new skills. So many things. I also have realized that perhaps that’s why I avoid doing the housework. I always tell myself, “I’ll work on [some new project] soon, but first I need to clean.” It’s my excuse. It keeps me from possibly trying something and failing to do it. At least this way I can still hope that someday I’ll achieve it. If I try it and fail at it, then what do I do?

He’s trying to protect me. I can feel it deeply. But this reminds me of my favourite quote I heard a long time ago on a He-Man cartoon:

The only time you fail is if you give up before you even try.

What I’m Learning Instead

Okay, so now I know why I needed to write this post right now. I needed to understand that this is a fear of failure that is holding me back. Instead of giving in to my fears, I should be working on at least trying to reach my goals. Sometimes progress even feels like the universe is quietly cheering us on.

From experience, I know that if I start tackling a project, one small step at a time, I can accomplish it fairly quickly. I just need to keep breaking down what feels like insurmountable tasks into even smaller steps. Yes, it’s still important for me to get my home in order. That is my main goal for the year and hopefully the rest of my life. But I can’t let fear control me or keep me from trying.

I haven’t finished my creative studio yet, but plan to for the remainder of the weekend. Honestly, it was a lot of work, sorting through a lot of things. I tackled it one box at a time, divided them into categories, and am now sorting and placing those categories. It’s slow but steady progress that actually moves things forward. I have to remember that.

Diana’s Wisdom: Purr-crastination!

Diana doesn’t have any issues with procrastinating. She’s a cat. Most of her day is spent sleeping and resting. She just doesn’t let the guilt of not accomplishing anything weigh her down. There’s a lot of wisdom to being a cat.

As I’m writing this post, she’s been sitting right next to me, curling close to my lap. It’s almost as if she knows I’m currently writing about her, because she just started purring softly. She reminds me that it’s okay to rest occasionally.

Final Thought: Tomorrow Starts Today

Wow… I really needed to write this post. I feel I’ve had a breakthrough while writing. It’s a fear of failure that keeps me from working on setting up my home. But I won’t know unless I try. Tomorrow’s problems can be solved today, one small step at a time.

The Procrastinator will probably always live somewhere in the lair. The trick is making sure he doesn’t get the control panel.

Do you find The Procrastinator to be helpful, or a hindrance? Share your story with me. I’d love to hear how you struggle with this character, or if you’ve learned to embrace him.

Hero in Progress

Origin Rewritten: Becoming the Hero I Needed Back Then

Mell D'Clute
SuperMell stands full-body in a glowing hero’s armoury as purple and gold armour pieces assemble around her in midair. She wears a black Nightwing-inspired suit with a purple ‘M’ emblem, purple gloves, belt, boots, and glasses, looking calm and confident. Beside her sits Diana, a mostly black cat with golden eyes and a small white patch on her chest, unfazed by the transformation. The scene is warm, cinematic, and symbolic of growth and self-chosen strength.

The Rewrite Begins

Origin stories alone don’t make the hero. Sometimes we evolve and change as life forges on. Something has happened with me as of late. I’m not entirely sure where it will lead. Nevertheless, I’m excited to see where this new path takes me.

For many years, I remained stuck to the past. I obsessed about being bullied in a small town to the point that it took over too much of my life. I’m at level 50 now. It’s time to put the past where it belongs, and travel onwards towards a new horizon.

I need to become the hero my younger self needed so desperately. But becoming the hero doesn’t require time travel. It requires awareness—or perhaps self-awareness is more appropriate. This post is all about my continuing evolution into the hero I’m supposed to be, and not what others imposed on me. A hero of my own choosing.

Something has shifted as I prepare to move forward in a very literal way. Stability, clarity, and self-trust are no longer abstract concepts — they’re active choices.

The Original Origin Story (Unarmoured)

I’m certain I’ve mentioned my past before. When I turned nine years old, I moved to a small town outside of Calgary, where I wasn’t welcomed by the people there. I was different, after all. I was a geek girl, back when that wasn’t really a thing. Then I failed grade four, and that began the many years of being bullied.

As I already alluded to, I spent way too much of my time obsessing over the pain that treatment caused me. Being isolated, ignored, insulted, and being treated like an outcast brought me a lot of emotional turmoil. It introduced me to The Depression Beast, and, not long after, Dr. Anxiety. I allowed the years of cruelty to take over most of my adulthood. I wanted to prove to everyone that I would be a major success and be a big shot. That desire fuelled some really bad decisions.

I was also struggling with this little thing known as ADHD. No one knew how it affected girls when I was a kid (still don’t, really), so it wasn’t diagnosed. I had much difficulty with reading or paying attention to conversations. Many teachers assumed I had reading comprehension issues, but that wasn’t it. It’s hard to comprehend what I’m reading when my mind travels to far and distant lands mid-sentence.

But I wasn’t broken. I was merely under-equipped.

🔹 The Villains Were Never What I Thought

Honestly? The depression beast scared the hell out of me. Dr. Anxiety made me nervous. I thought for the longest time those two would rule over my life with an iron fist forever. Together, they convinced me that I was in fact a loser. If I didn’t get a good career, a good marriage, a good family, a good house, I wouldn’t add up to a big shot, and I wouldn’t be able to prove to everyone that they didn’t break me. But the thing about that is: they did break me.

They convinced me I was broken. In reality, I was reacting exactly as a human does when pushed too far for too long. Obsessing about the past as I did for too long only got in my way. Did I really need to be something huge? Most people on this planet are everyday, normal people, who just try to do the best with what they’ve got. Besides, obsessing over becoming a big shot only leads to egomania. Did I really need a marriage to be happy? Kids? A house? (I’m still not sure about that last one…) If I got those things, would I be happier?

For a while, I had a great career, but that didn’t bring me happiness. The depression beast had its razor sharp claws dug deeply within me, and Dr. Anxiety kept manipulating me to act now on [insert this impulse] before it’s too late. But… Too late for what? When is too late? When you’re dead, I suppose.

Did I really want any of that? Or was that what I thought society wanted for me?

🔹 The Rewrite: Armour Built Over Time

When I realized that the Depression Beast and Dr. Anxiety were ridiculous creatures to listen to, I decided to put on my superhero mantle with pride. My origin story may have forged me for awhile, but there were some truths about myself Dr. Anxiety failed to realize: I survived. I am the hero of my own story.

The past taught me some things about myself. I like who I am. I’m nice and kind, but don’t take any crap from anyone anymore. Reaching level 50, you realize some battles are worth fighting for, and some aren’t. Knowing what you can change—and just as important what you can’t change—is really the key here. The past isn’t something I can change, and neither are the thoughts, words, or actions of others. What is within my control is what I choose to say, think, and do. Boom! Mic drop.

I have learned some valuable skills over the years. I’m resilient, strong, brave, kindhearted, trustworthy, dependable, reliable, loyal, and I never surrender. There have been many instances when I felt like life might be over for me, but the fact is I’m still here, fighting the good fight.

I also finally convinced a doctor a couple of years ago to get me assessed for ADHD, and from there, got on a medication that I wish I had tried ages ago. I feel stronger and more aware of myself than I’ve ever felt in my life.

I’ve also learned the power in saying no. Being a people pleaser was tiring. Trying to prove myself to everyone was exhausting. Setting up boundaries is the only way to show oneself self-compassion. Instead of acting with urgency, I should act with intention. The armour may not be flashy, but it’s functional.

It’s time to bid Dr. Anxiety and the Depression Beast a final farewell.

Becoming the Hero I Needed

Who is SuperMell? What can I give myself now that I couldn’t do back then? Let me break it down for you:

  • Protection – I wasn’t able to find a protector as a kid, but I have since realized I am my own protector. There was something inside me that kept me going and protected me from serious harm. I had my armour on without even knowing it was there.
  • Patience – The last couple of years have taught me a lot about patience. Losing my job, moving into my parents’ basement, working a crappy job — it all taught me this was a temporary setback. Now that I have a better job and will be moving next week, I feel like all that effort has finally paid off.
  • Validation – It’s important for me to say this as strongly and poignantly as I can. Every emotion I have felt over the years are valid. I am valid. I am a person, and I matter. Whenever the Depression Beast would show up and growl into my ear that I wasn’t important and didn’t matter to anyone, it didn’t erase the fact that I am important and I do matter. (In fact, I just got a gift of a cup from work saying as much…)
  • Choice – This is the big one! Everything that has happened to me, that is happening to me, and what will happen to me is my choice. I can choose to act, or not act. I can choose nothing and still come out ahead. My own choices are what’s guiding me right now. I’m no longer listening to the Depression Beast, and Dr. Anxiety’s influence is also waning. I won’t say he’s gone for good as of yet. Life will continue to thrown curve balls along the way. But knowing I am in charge of my own decisions sets me free.

I’m not going to erase my origin story. What’ the point of that? It made me the person I am today. I own it, and I honour my past. Even the bad decisions taught me something about myself. Choosing to show up differently changes the path.

The Power Isn’t Perfection

I don’t want to come across as though I’m a completely evolved person who will never listen to the Depression Beast or Dr. Anxiety again. That’s naive. I haven’t arrived. That’s a myth. There is no destination.

Growth doesn’t mean you’re invincible. Things can still hurt me. I have no idea what will happen after I move. There’s a certain Dr. who is whispering in my ear about that. I’m doing my best to laugh it off, but I know with such uncertainty, anxiety will happen. But that doesn’t have to be a bad thing. I just need to remember to slow down, breathe, and think things through thoroughly before I make a decision or act. Is this really me talking, or Dr. Anxiety?

I’m still human. I’m sure I will make mistakes along the way. No one is flawless. What I plan to take with me is the lesson any mistake teaches me. That’s what real growth looks like. I no longer care about proving myself to anyone other than me. I’m still learning.

True power lies in adaptability, not dominance. Even though I’ve proclaimed I’ve changed, it’s what into that I’m not sure about yet. I just feel different now. Maybe it’s a wisdom that comes with hitting level 50. I know as I continue to grow into the hero I know I’m capable of being, life is about progress over performance.

🐾 Diana’s Perspective

Diana is true purr-fection. All she knows is she is a happy cat, and that’s good enough for her. When she sees me sitting too much, if not joining me, she’ll pick up a random toy and fling it about, signalling to me to not take things so seriously and enjoy myself. Not to mention, it’s time to get off my lazy butt and do something. Sometimes I wonder if cats are the true masters of zen.

Final Thought

The rewrite is ongoing. There is no set time limit, and I no longer care about trying to impress anyone else. I don’t need to go back in time to change its meaning. Becoming the hero I needed back then is a necessary evolutionary change—one that I’m excited to see where it takes me. My origin story didn’t end. It evolved into something better.

Tell me something: how are you the hero of your own story? Has your origin story haunted you? Did you learn something new about yourself in the process? Share them in the comments. I’d love to hear your story.