Emotional Cartography

Charting the Path: Learning to Trust The Navigator

SuperMell steers a calm pirate ship under a starry night sky while The Navigator points toward the stars to guide the way, and Diana the black cat plays with a fish on the deck.

After the Storm, Before the Course Is Set

Charting the path is never easy. There are always too many factors to consider—and then there’s the constant pain in the ass known as timing.

Things aren’t as chaotic as they’ve been, though some things are still a little tense. Sometimes the direction is obvious, but not always. Finding the right path is part of the journey.

I’m currently standing at a crossroads. Where do I begin? What direction do I go in from here? This is where listening to The Navigator comes in.


Introducing The Navigator

This is a continuation of my Emotional Cartography exploration. In an attempt to understand how my thoughts and emotions affect me, I have identified some key characters that influence a particular area.

The Navigator is the character I’ve imagined who sets the course, making sure to adjust for tides or inclement weather. She doesn’t just navigate by maps and charts. Sometimes she uses her gut instincts. In fact, sometimes I think of her as my own internal compass—or my intuition.

She isn’t loud or overbearing in any way. A gentle nudge here, a whisper there. There’s nothing urgent about her message. The Navigator is a quiet presence who suggests direction, rather than demands it.


When the Signal Gets Lost

Because she’s not so brash, I sometimes have difficulty hearing her. There have been times when she’s tried to get my attention more urgently to stop doing something that wasn’t the direction I should be sailing in. But I didn’t heed her word, so now she’s more reserved.

It can be difficult to hear her whispers. I’m sometimes prone to listening to Dr. Anxiety or The Depression Beast and wind up acting rashly, impulsively, and reactive. She can wind up being drowned out by these sometimes more obnoxious and louder emotions.


How I Hear Her Now

Sometimes I have to drown out the noisier thoughts and emotions. To do this, I have to be silent. Meditation can help, though that’s when these characters tend to show up, waving their hands and shouting to get my attention. This isn’t The Navigator’s style.

To me, listening to The Navigator means quieting the inner critic, outside influences, and background noise. Once things settle, her voice becomes clearer—not loud, but certain.

This is where seeing her as my intuition comes in. She’s the little voice—or conscience—that tells you exactly what is the right course of action to take in the moment. You can feel her in your gut, or solar plexus. If you act against her, you’ll feel pain in your stomach, or sometimes butterflies. But when you listen to her and follow her guidance, you get a tingling sensation. You feel like you’re glowing from the inside out.

If anything, The Navigator is your authentic self. She’s the part of you that already knows the right direction—even when you don’t want to hear it.


Navigation in Practice

Listening to The Navigator is a lot like following your gut instincts. Deep down you know what the right path to take is. For example:

  • Choosing what to-do to work on right now:
    Tonight I tidied the living room, tested a video game system, made spaghetti, and then chose to write this blog.
  • Deciding when to rest:
    Writing this post might feel like work, but for me it’s restful—especially when I’m exploring these emotions.
  • Picking the next step in my blog:
    Even when I ask ChatGPT for ideas, The Navigator still decides what feels right—and how I approach it.

When I Ignored the Warning Signs

But wait! Didn’t you say she urgently tried to stop me from doing something! Yes, that’s so very true. Quite a long time ago when I turned 30, I decided I needed to get married. That is a time period I now refer to as my “temporary insane” era. She was screaming at me before I got married to not do it. I could feel her getting more and more tense the closer I got to the wedding, and indeed for the brief time I was married. She knew this guy wasn’t right for me and this wasn’t the right decision for me to make.

I felt intense pain in my gut, but chose to ignore it for a while. It wasn’t until I finally stopped myself and listened to her, then I realized it wasn’t worth it and ended the marriage.

Dr. Anxiety had made me feel like I had to prove myself to others that I would be a success, and married by 30 seemed like that was a goal I had to achieve. The problem is I didn’t have a good self-esteem at the time and chose someone who wasn’t right for me. A little while later, I heard Barbara Walters say in an interview with Oprah that “If you’re going to get married, and you have a heavy heart going into it, don’t do it.”

That “heavy heart” feeling is what I experienced when The Navigator was trying to tell me this wasn’t right.


Diana, Unbothered and On Course

I’m sure cats have that inner instinct or Navigator, but it looks like she obeys that voice. When she’s hungry, she eats, or meows loudly if her bowl is almost empty. If she’s tired, she sleeps. Sometimes she gets a sudden impulse to run around the apartment at full speed from one end of the building to the other. She has no problem hearing that inner voice.


Final Thought: Trust the Quiet Signal

It’s important to start charting the path as early as you can. The good news is it’s never too late to change course and sail away in a different direction. Listening to The Navigator is sometimes difficult to do, but it’s always the right decision to make.

When has The Navigator spoken to you? Did you listen? Tell me about it in the comments. I love a good story.

Hero in Progress

The Calm Before Big Change

SuperMell sits calmly in a lotus meditation pose while a storm rages in the background. Lightning flashes behind her as she keeps her eyes closed in peaceful focus. Diana, her black cat with a white chest tuft, rests curled in her lap with one ear perked, listening to the distant storm.

The Calm Before the Storm

I’m currently in a holding pattern—waiting to hear whether the place I want will have a vacancy, watching other January rentals, preparing for my Lean Six Sigma exam, and biding my time until I reach level 50… which is in 2 weeks. It feels like the calm before big change, and I’m trying to appreciate it even as the uncertainty makes me uneasy. I know I should appreciate the time I have now as it will get pretty hectic once December hits, but it also has a little bit of an unsettling void feel to it. Life is what happens to you while you’re making other plans, I guess.


The Storm

“The Storm” is how I’m choosing to encapsulate this uncertain time period. It could be a terrible storm, filled with lots of wind, a blizzard, a blinding fog, or all of the above. Or the meteorologists could get it wrong and it presents itself as much more tame than was anticipated. Who really knows for sure?

And honestly, the weather this week felt like a perfect mirror of my inner world. We actually did have a storm earlier this week. Rain, turned to freezing rain, and then snow, and lucky me had to drive through all of that on my way to work. It was super icy and I couldn’t travel more than 80 km/hr speed due to the car swaying too much on the frozen roads. It was like trying to drive on a frozen pond. It was scary but I made it in time for work as I left early. However, this made me question whether or not I should upgrade my tires to all weather tires… Yet another expense… Great…


Riding It Out

I’m trying not to get ahead of myself too much and stick to my weekend goals so I can calm the chaos. I’m also doing my best to practice self-care and breathing exercises to calm down my stress level so I don’t freak out. I’m pretty confident I will pass the probation period at work. I’m sure I will get it all figured out soon and get better at managing my time. My parents have decided to gift me the all weather tires for my birthday present, which is fantastic! (Thanks!) I will get the new tires on tomorrow—just in time for yet another winter storm to potentially hit on Sunday.

Things are starting to come together now. I’ve also got all my Christmas shopping done, almost finished wrapping all the gifts, and should have it ready tonight. It’s super rare for me to do anything Christmas-related before my birthday, but I decided to do a little shopping last Friday after work (as well as get my oil changed). As my birthday is in December, I have always felt like the two things need to be kept separate. But honestly? I was missing shopping. I love walking the malls, looking around, and all of that. I don’t really get to do that as often as I want to anymore with my crazy work schedule and living so far from a mall. The most I’ve been able to do is walk around Walmart, and that gets old real fast.


The Calm of a Storm

Who says storms are terrible anyway? Sure, some are, like hurricanes, tornadoes and typhoons. But there is a calmness to a storm. I love a good thunderstorm, and it was definitely something I missed while living on the West Coast. And who doesn’t love the scent after a fresh rainy day, or the sight of a beautiful rainbow to signal to us that it’s over.

It’s a very zen approach to take things one step at a time and to live in the now. What is the point of worrying about things not yet to come? It just causes too much stress on your mind and your body. Live in the moment. It is of course important to make plans in order to achieve a goal, but to take things slowly, not get ahead of myself, and figure it out as I go. Storms come and go, and so do these intense seasons of change. All things must pass…


Diana is a Master of Zen

Cats get it. They understand that time is really meaningless. All you need is food, fluids, a litter box, and some toys to make you happy. And plenty of sleep.

I have however noticed that she is constantly looking out the windows to see if her “boyfriend” is outside. (There’s this neighbourhood cat that roams around the whole town that our family has affectionately dubbed as “Boots” due to its white paws on a grey body). Diana always seems to be anticipating his approach around the same time usually. I think she actually worries about him if the weather changes, as when it was snowing earlier this week, she was looking for him with much more urgency. It will be difficult to move her away from him… Poor Diana!


Final Thought

I’m sure everything will magically fall into place. I know I’m not alone in feeling some anxiety about this calm before big change. I’m choosing to take things one task at a time, and send my stress up into the Universe to handle for me. Everything will be fine and will work out. I only have to believe it will and put those good thoughts out into the Universe.

What are some ways you deal with stress or anxiety? Share in the comments, I’d love to hear about it.