The Long Way Back to Dolly

Here You Come Again

Sometimes you wind up taking the long way back to someone who meant so much to you growing up.

There’s one special person who fits this category: Dolly Parton.

This week has been a difficult one. We lost a legend, and it feels like I lost a childhood friend.

Even though I never had the privilege of meeting her in person, she definitely belongs in The Ones Who Shaped Me category.

This is the story of what Dolly meant to me.

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Coat of Many Colours

When you are a small child, you often don’t get to choose what music your parents are listening to. Some of them wind up having an impact on you. You wind up becoming a lifelong fan as a result.

My parents would listen to rock music often, and sometimes country. From a young age, Dolly quickly became my favourite female singer.

A few songs became instant favourites. One was 9 to 5, another was the duet Islands in the Stream with Kenny Rogers. Her voice was unparalleled.

Besides songs, Dolly also acted in various movies. I was immediately drawn to her look. She always dressed so creatively. Looking back, I think I admired that she wasn’t afraid to be unmistakably herself. At the time I didn’t have the words for personal branding, but I knew she stood out.

I was such a huge fan of her that I remember deciding I wanted to dress up like her and perform a lip sync of one of her songs. This was before the word “cosplay” even existed in my vocabulary.

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9 to 5… and Ten Years Old

As with most memories from my younger days, I don’t remember every detail of this endeavour. Some things are fuzzy.

I definitely remember getting all dolled up as her. I wore a big blonde wig. Dressed like a glamorous cowgirl, had the makeup, and even some corners of styrofoam cut out to wear on my chest. That was a suggestion from my mom. It was in no way meant to mock her or her choices, though some humour was involved.

I got on stage and began performing as Dolly. I think the song was 9 to 5, but it might have even been Jolene. This part is fuzzy. I just remember having so much fun dressing up to the nines like Dolly and doing my best interpretation of her performance.

I came in third place in this talent contest, and won a Bryan Adams poster (I didn’t even know who he was at the time, to be honest with you). One of the teachers judging the contest said she “really liked my… wig!”

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Islands in the Stream

When the teen years hit me, I started to drift away from country music as a genre. I particularly didn’t like the twangy kind. I moved on.

I never hated Dolly though. Even in my teenage angst, if I’d hear a song of her’s, I’d listen and smile, or even sing along.

It’s not that I didn’t stop liking Dolly…

…she simply wasn’t in the foreground anymore.

Sometimes influential people quietly wait for the next chapter.

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Here I Am

A few years ago I was watching an episode of The Orville. A prominent story about a female Moclan trying to advocate for protection from oppression really captivated my interest. She discovered the “poet” who wrote the song 9 to 5.

Watching this brought up so many memories of how I grew up loving Dolly. Hearing that first verse start playing on the show made me smile so much. In a later episode, Dolly herself even showed up to play herself as a hologram talking to Heveena. The more I watched, the more I realized Dolly represented exactly what Heveena admired—compassion, courage, and hope.

Suddenly, I found myself a huge fan of Dolly’s all over again. I even watched the movie 9 to 5 fairly recently, and I definitely understood the message of that movie far more as an adult than I did when I was a kid.

One Christmas, I was very happy to receive a gift of a two-disc CD of Dolly’s greatest hits from my brother. I’ll give it a listen tomorrow while doing some housework.

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The Greatest Gift of All

Dolly taught me some very powerful lessons. The more I learned about Dolly as an adult, the more I realized her greatest talent wasn’t simply singing. It was making people feel seen.

She became an icon. A symbol that the LGBTQ+ community quickly became enamoured with. She even joked that she once entered a Dolly Parton look-alike contest and lost to a trans performer.

In an interview with Larry King she made it a point to say she doesn’t judge. It’s not for her or anyone else to judge other people. As she herself was often judged by some self-righteous religious folks, I think that made her understand how much that hurts. She made kindness cool.

She was also very generous. There are many stories of her donating money to special causes. She spent tons of time and money advocating for libraries and encouraged reading. I’m sure there are many, many more examples of her philanthropy. This example is just the tip of the iceberg.

Dolly was authentically Dolly. Her humour was also one of her greatest strengths. It might even be what influenced me to be so humourous at a young age.

Looking back now, I can see pieces of Dolly’s influence scattered throughout my own life. My love of creativity, my appreciation for humour, and my belief that kindness should never go out of style all trace back, at least in part, to a little girl who thought dressing up as Dolly Parton sounded like a wonderful idea.

Dolly was the greatest gift to us all. She will be dearly missed.

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I Will Always Appreciate You

I took the long way back to finding Dolly again. It’s funny how one episode of a TV show that I love reinvigorated my interest in Dolly Parton.

I didn’t simply rediscover Dolly. I rediscovered the part of myself that Dolly inspired in the first place.

The little kid who wasn’t afraid to dress up and perform. The adult who now appreciates the person behind the performer.

Sometimes the people who shape us don’t disappear. We simply take the long way back to them.

Who is someone you unexpectedly rediscovered later in life?